You & Your Social Skills, Improved.

Impressing a potential date is similar to impressing a potential employer.

You have to stand out.

Anyone can text. 

Anyone can use social networks. 

But can you hold a conversation?

Gentlemen, if you want to be taken seriously: stop texting, stop emailing, stop flirting through social media. Pick up the phone and call. That one gesture alone will separate you from the majority of guys who express interest in the woman you want.

Ladies, He's Just Not That Into You was right; the Texter in your life doesn't think you're worth the effort of a phone call or dinner. It's time to pull the plug. Stop responding to Texter, Facebook Messager, Profile Picture Liker, Snap Chatter, etc. Let the boys go find another girl to message occasionally -- you deserve a man with the guts to hold a conversation in the flesh.

So, to start and hold a meaningful conversation, these are key points to get down FIRST...

1). Know Yourself - (Particularly important if you are newly single or have never dated!) What makes you tick? What ticks you off? Do you prefer sushi or sandwiches? Various forms of these questions will come up in conversation. People appreciate honesty and sincerity (more on that in a moment!). Pinning down your own identity will also give you the confidence you need to decide whether or not your potential date is worthy of your most limited resource - your time.

2). Ask INTERESTING Questions - This means NO "yes or no" questions. Open-ended questions let the answerer know you're interested. It also allows you to find out if the two of you have similar interests (because you already know yourself!).

Example:

   "So, do you have any hobbies?"

   "How do you spend your free time?"

3). Use Your Ears - Listen sincerely and actively. Make eye contact. Ask questions to both understand and inform the other party that he or she is indeed understood. When someone else is talking, it is about them, it is not about you. Do not, I repeat DO NOT, make it about you. (This goes for all relationships--family, friendly, romantic, etc.) 

Example: 

   Potential Date Says: "We both knew the relationship was over, but we didn't want to break it off."

   You Say: "I had a two year long relationship like that. We were opposites. He wanted kids, but I didn't..."

   You Say: "That must have been difficult. What did you learn from that experience?"